5. I don't have a girlfriend who says she's a lesbian but has sex with blokes

Couple of things to deal with here. First off, let's call a spade a spade. If you want to say you're bisexual, fine. And likewise, if you're in possession of two X-chromosomes, and you find no attraction to the opposite sex, then well, fair enough, you can book your one-way ticket to the beautiful isle of Lesbos. But otherwise, it just doesn't make sense. It's like those "vegetarians" who eat fish, or who eat chicken, or white meat, or just not steak tartare.

Secondly, it's a bit lame if the only interesting thing you've got to say about yourself is your sexuality. So you enjoy inserting some appendages into some orifices, or having the same done to you. Well, so what? I reap quite some satisfaction from giving my nose a good blow when it's bunged up with a cold, but it's not like I think that would count as a reason for being superior to everyone, or even worth stating if it wasn't to point out the idiocy of the above stance.